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God Complex

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  • God Complex

    Well, since I've already been accused of "self promoting" (a completely rando, non-monetized Halloween video I made), I figured I might as well actually... "self promote" a project I'm working on... one actually intended to try and make money! It's a BOOK series! Maybe more... maybe a comic too at some point... maybe an anime of sorts... maybe even a movie! Gotta dream big!

    But for now it's just a tiny little seed that I'm trying to plant as I go around looking for some water...

    Click image for larger version

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    Still need to setup a SubscribeStar account for it, but the promo site is lookin pretty good so far.

    I usually post updates here...

    Latest update being about... mmmm... right nyah....

    And right nyah...

    I'm hoping to have a new excerpt out by Halloween... it's really hard to write that particular scene though... it's like... "intimate horror".

    Basically Calaphranda gets repeatedly killed over and over and over and over and constantly rewriting reality inside of her is what turns her into an artificial God form. Her circulatory system eventually becomes completely imaginative in nature and her blood becomes emotion made manifest into reality (which resembles a kind of fluid crystal like material). In turn she gains the power to cross through and open doorways into imaginative and emotional based dimensional spaces (which is important for something that happens later in the story).

    ...of course the whole bit about how they basically trick her and how her sibling got completely erased from reality and how they just decided not to tell her and... well, things have to fall apart a bit before they can come back together. The other characters have a lot of their own issues to work out too.

  • #2
    Originally posted by Linkblade
    ...uh, yeah, I think I'd rather you just didn't read it. ಠ_ಠ


    • #3
      Originally posted by Linkblade
      Onideus Ok Matthew, since your last post

      was soaked in arrogance, I wondered what you would write as a story and looked into this God Complex thing. It's very interesting that one of the protagonists is also called "Onideus", which is your current username. You probably identify with him.
      Technically speaking all of the characters are "me", or at least based on certain aspects of my personality that have been split off, exaggerated and mixed around a bit. I would say I probably identify with Krysti the most though. I actually use her name as a username more than Onideus at this point, especially in gaming.

      Onideus in the story looks like some kind of demon and is a higher being who can take claws into his neck and still laugh before showing his powers by transforming into what others fear to make them suffer in agony. He treats others, especially present in the excerpts are women, like worms and as if he has the overall knowledge of everything.
      Most excellent! I am very happy that you interpreted it that way... I was actually a bit worried that I wasn't making it seem genuine enough. You see Onideus is supposed to be seen, initially, as this horrible demon like monster, like chaotic evil, unfeeling and malevolent... but as the story goes on it winds up being revealed that, that isn't actually the case at all. Onideus turns out to be more like the character Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho, initially presented as a kind of bad guy, but then eventually revealed to be a lot more.

      Like making Krysti suffer, it turns out he's not doing that for the fun of it or out of vindictive spite. It's later revealed that when he looked into her, he could see the two sides of her that are fighting and knows what's preventing her from being able to use more of her power. The "suffering" she experiences actually turns out to be a sort of Rosetta Stone for understanding the two sides of herself, essentially pain as a form of language and it turns out to be exactly what she needs to resolve her internal conflict... to keep the conflict going, the pain, but to change the underlying context behind the pain... so then it becomes more like an athlete pushing themselves through pain to become stronger, as opposed to pain that's just leaving you feeling victimized.

      And it's even FURTHER revealed that the only reason he even went along with Mimkrys's plan to turn Calaphandra into an artificial God form is specifically because he knew what kind of power she develop and, because he also saw into Krysti, knew that, that power would be the only way for Krysti to directly access her emotional and imaginative selves.

      There's a few other prominent twists and turns, but those are some of the biggest ones.

      That you seem to identify with him fortifies my observation of you being arrogant.
      Well I do strive to be a bit arrogant... not to say it's all that genuine, but I do think it's generally good, as a human being, to try and have a well developed sense of self-esteem.

      And I guess there maybe some kind of inconvenience you have with girls.
      Kind of the opposite actually. I have a much easier time with women than with guys. Not as much anymore, but when I was young, especially as a teen, I had a LOT of trouble with other guys my age. To say I was "adversarial" would be putting it mildly. I didn't have many "guy friends" and even the ones I did have I would occasionally fight with. On the flip side, I had tons and TONS of female friends and spent the overwhelming majority of my teenhood being around girls. Even when I was a little kid though being around girls was just... easier, nicer.

      Not entirely sure why that is... probably cause of the abuse I suffered from my dad I guess... I just... don't really like guys very much and can't emotionally connect well with guys. With women I feel much more relaxed, with men I feel like... LET US BATTLE FOR DOMINANCE!

      Please don't take this as an offence but as interest in your character as a person.
      I'm not really offended by anything... but then again I don't really take much in life too seriously to begin with... least of all myself.

      Which kind of video games do you usually play?
      It varies. I usually go through "cycles" of interest, like presently I was having a serious game craving for a Baldur's Gate 2: Dark Alliance style game, so I started off checkin out Albion which looked a bit promising but then it turned out not to have controller support and it just became increasingly more tedious and boring... and not in a good, grindy kind of tedious way. So then I poked around a bit more and was thinkin about playing Diablo III, but then decided to check out Grim Dawn and... wooo... yeah, that hits the spot.

      Next in my cycle will probably be Kingdom Hearts-ish... likely the new one, which I still haven't played yet (been kinda saving it). And previously in my cycle was something Metroidvania style, which was finally satiated with the release of Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night. And beyond that any general RPG style games, especially old school stuff. On a rare occasion I'll switch it up with something random, with usually a few select titles being my favorites. Like Einhänder is probably my favorite "bullet hell" shooter style game. I think the only kinds of games I genuinely dislike are 1st person shooters and dating sims... neither of those really holds much interest to me at all. In fact 1st person games bother me so much I actually had to use the code hacks in Portal and Portal 2 just so I could play them in 3rd person.

      The only games that I play consistently, on a regular/daily basis are Maplestory and Maplestory 2.. although a large part of that is being in one of the "top guilds" so it's more of an obligation/job of sorts, lest we wind up bumped out of the top 3 spots. The worst I think is the one weekly guild raid thing we gotta do, which takes like over an hour and there's this one part of it that's a horrible freakin jump quest with ICE and then it takes 10 people and we have to organize roles and... pleh... I'm more the "hack and slash" kinda player. Give me a good long grind to satiate my OCD inclinations and just let me berserk my way on into the fight! Strategizing is something I'd rather do in the real world, not in video games.
      Last edited by Onideus; 10-29-2019, 06:11 PM.


      • Onideus
        Onideus commented
        Editing a comment
        I'm a very complicated person. I tend to react reflectively a lot of the time, so I'm not always nice, in fact I can be pretty mean sometimes depending on the person/circumstances. Generally speaking when people are nice to me I'm nice to them, but I'm a bit hypomanic so it's like I'm in a perpetual state of happiness, at least by "normal" metrics.

        Because of that though I have a hard time empathizing with what "normal" people find to be emotionally upsetting/triggering. I can sympathize, but I cannot directly comprehend, for example, what it's like to get upset over things that people say. I mean you could insult me, you could hate me, you could spend every waking moment screeching out obscenities and disparaging remarks and... *shrugs* ...I would mostly care about the quality and originality of the invective attacks and would only feel upset/annoyed if they were derivative and boring.

        That nature though tends to be a bit anti-social in that I often come across as being overbearing, irrepressible, arrogant, boisterous, etc. Generally speaking the more sensitive a person is, the more they tend to hate me. Where as the more laid back someone is, the more they tend to like me.

    • #4
      Update - Nov 16, 2019 - New Excerpt - Standing On The Edge Of Yesterday

      Well, I had to take a break from writing the horrible, HORRIBLE part, so I switched gears for a bit and wrote this fun little bit...

      It's a scene that happens after they rescue Calaphandra and they take her to one of their bases, which she doesn't realize isn't on earth at first. She also gets a very "up close" introduction to Krysti and has a brief moment of realization that she's lost something important (her brother).

      Originally I was going to make it her sister that was lost, but I reworked some stuff and I'm going to have it be her brother, which better fits with some... other stuff, that I haven't divulged yet.

      Even with as many spoilers as I've gone on about there's still a bunch more twists in the story, some of which are very nostalgic in nature because they involve the imaginative and emotional planes of reality.

      If you're a child of the 80s... boy I'm tellin ya... Krysti's backstory is gonna gut ya right in the nostalgic feels! Sort of like Ready Player One, but on a much more intimate/emotional level, where as that movie was largely just superficial eye candy with very little emotional connection.